hello fellow truth-seeker. i commend thee

i know fish people are real because i SAW one!!! sometimes it can be a little hard to tell the difference between a regluar person and a Fish-Type. the main characteristics of a fish-man (vs a real man) are as follows:

1. strange skin(perhaps wet)
2. blinking too much or even, not enough
3. climbing out of the briny deep, trident and speared animal in hand, draped in a cowl of algae, seaweed and barnacles
4. sometimes they are actually blue/green
5. due to their mucous fish men have a slight magnetic pull and will sometimes get stuck to the fridge for a moment. they will try to play this off ("oops, stuck on the fridge again, haha haha")
6. being mean and rude to you is actually a signifier
7. fish people have a perverse desire to collect strange objects (twines, strings, beads) and will become VERY disconcerted and erratic when you mention "the collection"
8. lying, trying to decieve is a fish man trait ("i am not a fish-man", "you are being evicted", for example)